Shadow…

~
Where did it go…
What happened to me…

One day I owned it…
The next, it was free…

Leaving me pleading…
For it to return…

Begging it to listen…
End my aching burn…

And escape the dark cloud…
Hanging over my head…

Because it gave me hope…
But it also misled…

As it left me helpless…
And it’s left no trace…

So I chase its memory…
But I can’t remember its face…

Just the way that it felt…
When it promised it was mine…

As even in darkness…
And the day to day grind…

It helped me see light…
And feel rain on my skin…

Yet now it has left me…
Nothing ever gets in…

My heart is locked and bolted…
There’s no beat, no boom…

I stare at the walls…
I’m trapped in this room…

Talking to the silence…
Worrying about consequences…

As it’s muted my soundtrack…
And it has numbed all my senses…

Because it was my pride…
And it was my joy…

Yet I never realized…
It could fucking destroy…

Leaving me a pale shadow…
Of the person I used to be…

Forever locked in this limbo…
Floating in its dead sea…

~

©Eyewillnotcry1973

Inspired by the song “Shadow” covered by Justin Currie

Soul Searching…

~

“Is this what you want?”…
She quietly said…

Searching for a sign…
As her words struck his head…

He assessed the situation…
Within the darkened room…

Another sinful interaction…
Another nail in his tomb…

Admiring her beauty…
Her matching underwear…

Under Lust’s influence…
He really shouldn’t have cared…

But the voices began talking…
Distracting from the moment…

And stood at a crossroads…
He really couldn’t comment…

He wasn’t sure what he wanted…
But she really was all his…

This stunning fucking Goddess…
Like a Queen Mermaid fish….

Surrounded by an aura…
Like no other he’d ever met…

From the minute he saw her…
Common sense began to melt…

And in that stolen moment…
All his fantasies became real…

But it wasn’t like the movies…
There was more to this deal…

The heavy weight of guilt…
The magnitude of it all…

He was high above the clouds…
It would be a long, long fall…

And pausing for a breath…
He tried to soak it all in…

Burned the vision in his mind…
And then tried to begin…

But his words were so futile…
The feeling overwhelmed him…

And in a moment of weakness…
Began a night of pure sin…

~

©Eyewillnotcry1973

Inspired by the song :”Make it always be too late” by Del Amitri

My Kingdom…

~

This is a very dark place…
A place he knows so well…

A place that feels like home…
A space that feels like Hell…

Emotions are hard to articulate…
So he bottles them up inside…

And fights the constant battle…
As tears well up in his eyes…

Always looking for signs of hope…
Some light through those cracks…

But all he sees are the demons…
Who surround and then attack…

Wounding him with vicious words…
Tearing at his tattered, fragile soul…

Always knowing just what to say…
In order to assume full control…

Which makes it hard to function…
Out in the cruel, cold world…

Amid the weight of expectation…
Where a hand of darkness is curled…

Keeping such a very tight grip…
Limiting his thoughts and actions…

Making it hard to breathe some days…
Numbing his senses and reactions…

But those who live around him…
Are unaware of his perpetual war…

Though this fight goes on every day…
They see only what they think they saw…

As the dark and violent struggle…
Is not for their eyes to see…

So he’s perfected the art of deception…
To ensure it remains a mystery…

Spending a lot of time looking…
Like a man who needs no help…

Trying to make it through each day…
Playing the hand that was dealt…

Surviving in a very dark place…
A place he now knows so well…

A place that he calls his home…
And a kingdom that feels like Hell…

~

©Eyewillnotcry1973

Inspired by the song “This Is My Kingdom Now” By Justin Currie

Note – Justin Currie has a new CD out in May and will be touring the UK – see below for details:

Justin Currie ‘This Is My Kingdom Now’, Tracklisting:

1. My Name Is God
2. Fallen Trees
3. This Is My Kingdom Now
4. Sydney Harbour Bridge
5. Crybabies
6. Failing To See
7. The Dead Sea
8. Abandoned Sons
9. Hey Polly
10. I Love The Sea
11. I’ll Leave It To You
12. Two People
13. My Soul Is Stolen

Justin Currie & The Pallbearers, UK Tour Dates:

Fri 26 May – Perth Concert Hall
Sun 28 May – Holmfirth Picturedrome
Mon 29 May – Pocklington Arts Centre
Tue 30 May – Wolverhampton Slade Rooms
Wed 31 May – Liverpool Hangar 34
Fri 2 June – Cambridge Junction 1
Sat 3 June -Islington Assembly Hall
Sat 24 June -Northern Roots Festival, Inverness

Guest Poet 3 – Celtic Green…

This week, these pages are turned over to selected Guest Poets – I hope you enjoy!

My third Guest Poet has also submitted a first time post– so please welcome Donna!

You can read more of Donna’s work here: https://pettingcatpoetry.com/

If you would like to send a submission in for a future Guest Poet spot, please email eyewillnotcry@hotmail.co.uk

Cheers

J

There it is the Celtic green
Dancing under the chin
Traveling down the arm
Sharing places where music has been

A color imbibed in photosynthesis
Inspired by the sun
Central to the stage
Where my vision is drawn

Green pendant of peace
Draped and bespoke
It sways to the artists reverie
A sensual accord evoked

Ritualistic gesture
Inclined to inspire
But the magic is in the music
Void slight of hand and attire

Broken Down…

~

Why did you do it…
Why did you come back…

Subjecting my world…
To a sustained attack…

Casting your spells…
And poisoning my mind…

Is this just a game to you…
Why act so unkind…

You know that I’m weak…
You know my Achilles heel…

Yet you exploit my feelings…
Put me though this ordeal…

Does it make you smile…
To inflict all this pain…

Has it become your mission…
To drive me insane…

And make me pay…
For all my mistakes…

Is this what you want…
Is this what it takes…

Getting your thrills…
By watching me suffer…

Was I really that bad…
Hurt you like no other…

Leaving those scars…
So deep and so wide…

Hurting so badly…
Omnipresent, deep inside…

That have left you damaged…
With a thirst for revenge…

And you know how to get it…
You know I’ll descend…

Because I’m an addict…
And you are my drug…

Which makes it so easy…
For you to smile so smug…

And taste your victory…
Over and over again…

Getting off on my torment…
Getting high on my pain…

~

©Eyewillnotcry1973

Inspired by the song “Come Undone” by Raymond Meade FT Justin Currie

City of the Dead…

~

Walking through the rain…
In the city of the dead…

A thousand years of history…
A million tears shed…

Dreams that have crumbled…
Trampled under the feet…

Of a weary population…
Who no longer see it…

Passing by the tombstones…
And the inscribed names…

Never stopping to wonder…
Focused only on their shame…

The burden they each carry…
Inside their sinful hearts…

Struggling through the day…
As monotony once again starts…

Like automated robots…
With a program to follow…

Missing the point of life…
Hearts wooden and hollow…

In a world that’s become…
About the here and now…

Obsessed with consumerism…
And the latest cash cow…

It wasn’t always like this…
It used to mean much more…

A world filled with pride…
That only exists in folklore…

Now stories are passed down…
Laced with mild frustration…

Falling on the deaf ears…
Of this current generation…

About what was once a kingdom…
That’s forever buried and lost…

Whilst the beaten and damned…
Quietly sit and count the cost…

Under a dark rain cloud…
In the city of the dead…

Where no one hears the screaming…
Or a single word that’s said…

~

©Eyewillnotcry1973

Inspired by the song “Nothing Ever Happens” by Del Amitri

Eternal Regret…

~
The pain deep inside…
Is now burning again…

Can’t swallow my pride…
Or even remember when…

The last one came…
Or the first one went…

But it feels like I’m heading…
On a downward decent…

To where the fires ignite…
And they dance on hot coals…

Where nobody cares about…
The things that I stole…

And hearts that got taken…
Which were never returned…

The look on their faces…
Those memories still burn…

The root cause of my pain…
Where there is no relief…

Yet I acted so cold…
When playing the thief…

And prefected the art…
Of  looking like I didn’t care…

As I took what I needed…
And left them stood there…

Not having any clue…
That it all stemmed from me…

They never opened their eyes…
They could not fucking see…

That I silently stole from them…
Removed their defensive walls…

Speaking with no conscience…
Never worrying about the fall…

But now there’s no one beside me…
And there’s no hand left to hold…

After loving and leaving them…
There’s no single band of gold…

And sat here all alone…
There’s a clarity in silence…

Regretting the pain I caused…
My soul full of internal violence…

~

©Eyewillnotcry1973

Inspired by the song “Still In Love” by Justin Currie

Devoid…

~

He’s found a way to live…
Devoid of all emotion…

A simple trick of the mind…
Sets the wheels in motion…

And locks it all away…
Preventing any tears…

That would flood his eyes…
If he remembered all the years…

The good times and the bad…
All his stupid mistakes…

On the road that he has travelled…
The decisions that he makes…

In the search of distraction…
Whilst hidden in plain sight…

But distorting his reality…
Under the cover of night…

Where he becomes another…
Assumes that personality…

The one that he keeps hidden…
So no one else can see…

Like Jekyll and Hyde…
At the flick of a switch…

A quick transformation…
Like a spell cast by a witch…

Turning to the dark side…
Tuning into evil thoughts…

Listening to the demons…
Forgetting all he was taught…

And living in the shadows…
Searching for like minds…

Who may understand him…
And not judge whatever they find…

But then he forgets it all…
In the light of the morning sun…

Pretends it never happened…
And moves on, starts to run…

Like a scared little child…
A boy just like Peter Pan…

Who never really grew up…
Or understood life’s plan…

Like he’s trapped in a prison…
His own private cell…

He can never escape it…
Some days it feels like Hell…

So he’s found a way to live…
Devoid of all emotion…

It’s how he now exists…
It’s the path that he has chosen…

~

 

Soul Searching…

~

“Is this what you want?”…
She quietly said…

Then searched for a sign…
As her words entered his head…

Where he assessed the situation…
Within the darkened room…

Another sinful interaction…
Another nail in his tomb…

As he admired her beauty…
Her matching underwear…

And under lust’s influence…
He really shouldn’t have cared…

But the voices began talking…
Distracting from the moment…

And stood at a crossroads…
He really couldn’t comment…

He wasn’t sure what he wanted…
But she really was all his…

This stunning fucking Goddess…
Like a Queen Mermaid fish….

Surrounded by an aura…
Like no other he’d met…

From the minute he saw her…
All common sense began to melt…

And in that stolen moment…
His fantasies became real…

But it wasn’t like the movies…
There was more to this deal…

The heavy weight of guilt…
The magnitude of it all…

He was high above the clouds…
It would be a long, long fall…

And pausing for a breath…
He tried to soak it all in…

Burned the vision in his mind…
And then tried to begin…

But his words were futile…
The feeling overwhelmed him…

And in a moment of weakness…
Began a night of pure sin…

~

©Eyewillnotcry1973

Inspired by the song :”Make it always be too late” by Del Amitri

“If he’s treating you, like I treated you”…

~

You don’t look older…
You just look so sad…

Like the troubles you carry…
Are the worst you’ve had…

That sparkle in your eyes…
Is duller than I recall…

The glint of diamonds…
Is hardly there at all…

And I know that it’s been…
Such a very long time…

Since we were together…
And everything was fine…

In the haze of that summer…
In the midst of the madness…

You’ve clearly moved on…
Yet inherited a sadness…

That drapes over your face…
Like a thin white veil…

And sits on your shoulders…
That appear gaunt and frail…

While the smile you paint…
On your soft, pretty face…

Can’t cover up your pain…
Or even begin to chase…

Those dark demons away…
That now reside in your head…

Who have stolen your identity…
Causing tears to be shed…

And there’s nothing I can say…
There’s nothing much I can do…

To light up this darkness…
To take the burden from you…

As the distance has grown…
The dynamics have changed…

You’ve acquired a new life…
I’m cast adrift and estranged…

On the outside, looking in…
Wishing we could restart…

And turn back the clock…
To before I lost your heart…

~